October 27th. Random Acts of Kindness Day. I wish I could go cube to cube in the office, suck every cock that I could get until they pumped their load down my throat. I wonder if something like that would be frowned upon.
I found a pic that I like. I Fuck on the First Date. And I do. Or at least I would when I get that first date.
Can I still call myself a virgin if I have had toys up my hole?
Is it strange that my favorite jack-off thoughts are of sucking cock and being fucked?
Is there such a thing as an anal orgasm? I think I need alot of hands on research to find the truth in that. Not that it matters too much. My thrill is in knowing that I am pleasing a real man, milking his cock with my mouth or my fuckhole. Making him cum in me is all I want. I don't want to be sucked, or fuck. When I am with him, I will be his woman.
I know it is wrong, not safe, and all that other stuff. But when I do finally get fucked, I want him to breed me. I want to feel the heat of his cock in me. I want to feel his cock pulse and he fills my bowels with his seed.
Halloween is coming. Perfect time to go buy slutty clothes and not get too many strange looks. But I am afraid of hanging out with my friends like that. Afraid they will notice how much I like it. Afraid that when I get drunk or stoned, I'll end up begging for cock. I can imagine being at the party. Some guy comes up behind me, hand on my hip, asks me if I want to go to the bathroom and sniff something. I walk up the stairs in front of him, and he can see the tops of my stockings with every step I take. We close the bathroom door, and he gets busy with the powder and mirror... takes a toot for himself. My turn. I bend over to get the straw, and I can feel his hands on my legs, rubbing up to my ass. It feels good, and I press back into him. I warn him, "You know I'm a guy, right?". "Tonight your not.", he tells me. Happy with that answer, I bend over and do my line. I can feel his growing cock grinding against my ass. Finished, I move to my knees, unzip his pants, pull out his cock and lick it all over. I wrap my lips around it, and eagerly suck it into my mouth. He moans and tells me what a good little cocksucker I am. I am thrilled with these words, because it is one of the things I want most... to be a great cocksucker. The other think I want most is to be a great fuck. I want a guy to want to fuck me. I don't care if he things I am ugly, as long as he things I am a great lay. Anyway, I feel his cock swelling, and he pumps his load into my mouth. Before I swallow him down, I open my mouth so he can see it. I thank him for the white stuff, and walk out.
I need kind of a dominate guy, cause I am sure to be shy, at least that first time. Not dominant like... whips and chains. I don't want pain. But it is a turn on to think of him telling me what a little slut I am. Sissy Cock Sucking Whore.
In general, I don't like the idea of a glory-hole. Sucking cock just loses some of it's nastiness if he can't look down and see how much I love it. Or for me to be able to see him as I suck him.
It would be cool to run into a friend or co-worker at the glory hole. At least you know they are either there to suck or be sucked. I would grab him by the belt, and pull him into an empty both. Maybe drop my pants, so he could see my panties and stocking. Fall to my knees and give him the blow job of his life. As long as he could keep his mouth shut, I would be his cock milker for as long as he wanted. I can imagine the lunch meetings at the park, with his cock in my mouth. Or review time, bent over his desk while he reamed my ass. I had a friend once... I think I could have. But I didn't. A thought for another day.
There is something about being either drunk or stoned that makes me want cock more than anything. Don't get me wrong, I would take a load drunk or sober. But I just want to be so slutty when I am intoxicated. I was at a friend of mine's house smokin' some pot the other day. I kept drifting off into sweet fantasies of being treated as a fuck puppet. I would have begged and pleaded to have a guy whip it out and go down on it like a starving woman. Then bend me over and fuck my brains out. The only thing missing was a cock in need.
I need a man. A daddy. Someone I can have on speed dial. Someone I can call whenever I am in the need of a good dicking. Only got 15 minutes? "Can I eat your cum, please?" 45 minutes? "Fuck me, Daddy!" An hour or more? "Make me your slut, please fill my stomach and my pussy".
Where do I find a guy like that? Craigslist? A bar? Do you find sissy lovers in a gay bar? I would love to be picked up in a straight bar. Sitting next to some guy, and then feel his hand on my knee.
I've never been attracted to guys. But cocks. Beautiful, beautiful cocks. I want to worship them. On my knees, hands and knees, on my back or riding on top.
Okay. I guess that is enough for the first time. Not sure if anybody is going to read this or not. Maybe I'll get lucky and it will be some guy in the Denver area who wants a sissy cock-milker of his own.